Friday, December 23, 2011

Padawan: Year One

I stood over him and paused, confusion touching my face. I reached out and gathered the Force to calm myself. I noticed that his blood was cooling on my face, even as I became aware of shouting and screams.

The students around us had horrified look on their faces, and several of the masters were discussing things in an unusually heated manner off to the side. I stretched out with my senses and heard them discussing me. One of them was angry and called me a monster, and I watched in shock as the iron face of my master split with the beginnings of rage.

He admonished Master Kollus for his lack of acceptance, and turned from the continuing discussion to approach me. His eyes contained that same ephemeral quality I had seen, and he knelt down to check on the student at my feet.

I watched him use the force to mend several injuries before he turned to face me. I awaited praise, but I felt confusion take me again as he gently reprimanded me, telling me that there was no need for such extremes while practicing. As he stood he told me that I needed to take things easier on the other students, as they lacked my skills. This took me several moments to process, as it seemed so nonsensical. Involuntarily, I cringed and set myself for the punishment as he raised his hand, but again he confused me by simply wiping the blood from my face with his robes.

He grasped my hand and told me there would be no more combat training this week, as he cast a glance at Master Kollus, who seethed and eyed us with a dark gaze. He then lead me off towards the temporary housing we had been assigned, trying to explain why the other students and teachers were so shocked. I did not understand it very well, but I planned meditate on it later. I felt the confusion fade in the comfort of his touch. I resolved to better learn the ways of this new home, so as not to disappoint him again.

Prelude

This time, the grip burned with the heat of his fury. This time, he would fulfill his promise. This time, he would kill me. I felt the skin of my throat crisp and flake away. I could smell the flesh of my face as it scorched in that fire. This had to be it. This had to be the end he had so often spoken of.

As my consciousness began to fade to black, everything was lit by brilliant blue. I could hear the gurgle of blood gathering in my master's throat, and hear the hiss of the blade that impaled it. I was barely aware that I was falling until I impacted the hardened and desiccated earth.

I gathered the Force to push away the pain, and to try to stand to face this unknown. I gasped, and collapsed again, realizing both of my arms were shattered. I struggled to open my mind to the Force, and in time, I was able to see. I saw my master dead, a strange look on his face, one I had never seen him wear, shock. This somehow managed to shake my apathy and I shuddered with fright.

Focusing, I pushed my sight farther, until I saw, standing above him, a man with the face of iron. So disparate from my master's face, which was always shifting as though a violent tempest, this man's face was stoic and calm. With a hiss, the blue of the blade disappeared, and the iron faced man reached down to me. I saw something in his otherwise impassive eyes that I did not recognize, and something I would struggle for the rest of my life to learn and to understand.

Mercy.